Saturday, 27 April 2013

Time Away

Kim whisked me away to an over night get away.  He knows me - knew I needed a reprieve from the sorting of memories and cardboard boxes, writing, meetings, and self-imposed deadlines.
View From  Our Room

At breakfast this morning, overlooking the canvas of lake and mountains and sky, he asked me a great question.  "What emotion do you regularly experience that you wouldn't have expected?"  My response was a kind of peace/confidence that my son is doing so incredibly well, and always will be.  His response was - joy.  "You don't really know how bright the white of joy is until you have darkness right next to it. It's Brilliant."
And then the tears started...missing Jordan's influence in our lives.  What a gift...what a privilege!

Thursday, 18 April 2013

Wood And Stucco

Kim here. It’s my turn to give an update. Darlene has been focused in her role as a sexual integrity and relational health workshop presenter for Jr. High and Hi School students in the area. She loves it but it is a lot of work. Plus, during our past moves, she carried the lion’s share of the moving, so it’s my turn to carry the heavy end on this one.  All this packing and organizing are creating a longing for our heavenly home. We live in shacks made of wood and stucco. I am thankful for them, but no matter how beautiful,  I wasn't made for wood and stucco. I was made for streets paved with gold and accommodations that took thousands of years to perfect. Below is a picture Jordan drew that outlines what he imagined his heavenly home to look like. I think it’s even better than what he thought or imagined.

In the last blog, Darlene said that simplifying was good, very good.  I agree. The more you have, the more things break. I am sooo looking forward to simple and no mortgage.

I am also looking forward to the summer, not because of the warmth and the sun, but because we are setting aside July and August for something very special. In the parable of the sower, Jesus talks about what keeps the seed of the word from being fruitful. One is the seed falling among the thorns – which describes the believer as (Luke 8:14), “choked with worries and riches and pleasures of this life, and brings no fruit to maturity. I feel that some days. I don’t walk around in a state of anxiety, but: its bills, and clients, home repairs, and “did I remember to renew the insurance on the car?”, and since we hadn't worked in 14 months – do we trust God to carry us through? and the grass is getting long, but the mower is out of gas, and … you know what I am talking about. All the stuff of life can distract us from being the soil that allows the seed from bearing a 100 fold harvest. Back to July and August – we are setting them aside to focus on Jesus. It’s not meant as a vacation, but a time to set aside distractions and pray, read, walk, sing, fix our eyes on Jesus, hear what He has to say, and do what He says. We are going to Victoria for two months to sit at Jesus’ feet and do what He says. Why Victoria? We've got some friends there that want to do the same thing. We know that we will be sent to the streets to heal the sick and preach the gospel to the poor. If you want to read more about my thoughts on this, below is a link for an article I wrote for the new JGLM Magazine:

As we prepare for the summer, we are excited to have the men coming home from Saskatchewan on May 4th to help us move. It is so good to be together.

If you want our new address, just email us at and we will get that to you.

Sunday, 7 April 2013

New Nest

We've found a house to rent.  It has most of the things on my list of hopefuls.  The biggest adjustment, aside from not containing any memories, will probably be the size. It is about a third the size of our home now has a fifth of the storage space.  It does require simplifying...which is good. Really good.
It's the lack of memories that I have to trust Father for.  It is near a golf course and trails where Jordan and Tucker raced while Kim and I strolled the winter before our lives changed so dramatically.  I am grateful for that...I can see Jordan's legs carrying him effortlessly over the hills and I can hear his voice goad Tucker into following him as he bobbed and weaved his way along.   I so miss his laughter and squishes and questions and opinions and observations and voice and his presence.

Being thrown into empty nesting was not the plan.  I was jealously guarding our years with Jordan at the time he would leave to travel or attend school, I would be ready...or so I told myself.

It is crazy what comforts me:  new pictures of Jordan people send or I find in the packing, Skyping my sons, reconnecting with long ago friends, clean sheets and sharp pencils, warm mugs beside the fire, hearing stories of people being healed, finding Kim has unloaded the dishwasher or filled a vase with tulips or white roses, BBC dramas from Dickens, and waterfalls beside a mountain road.
Some mornings I apply makeup only to find it was a really bad idea - on the way to work my face is streaked with tears.  Other days I find only joy and laughter in Jordan's life - then and now.  Such is my life...until this side of eternity is over.