Close Call

This morning began with Kim and me gathering our suitcases for a move to Canuck House, a children's hospice in Vancouver, 4 hours away.  Too many systems seemed to be shutting down in Jordan's body for us to continue to care for him well.  Joel drove himself to the airport after a tearful goodbye.  We were all in rough shape.  A few significant answers to prayer later and we headed to our local hospital instead, for an MRI.  As a result, we're headed once again to begin radiation Sunday morning for another spot in Jordan's spine.  But we're back home tonight and we're all so grateful.  Dinner and Tucker met us when our little family returned home.  Sights for sore eyes.  God bless our wonderful friends.

Because of Jordan's leg, spine and arm, his strategy has been to stay pretty much immobile to practice pain avoidance.  No wonder he sometimes expresses the feeling of being trapped - not being free to move.  New friends, Dave and Patti, are flying in tomorrow night for a few days of concerted prayer.  They recently arrived on the scene just after I asked Father for additional experienced reinforcements with a track record in healing.  Thank you Jesus!

One of Jordan’s new favourite songs – “This is what You do” by Matt Stinton

Choosing Praise

Hope is a certain positive expectation of good for the future.  And I'm watching Kim and Jordan though the sliding doors in the hot tub right now choosing Hope. After spending the morning in bed, Jordan made his way downstairs to our hot tub where his mobility is less impeded.  I was thinking back to the last time I saw Jordan walk.  It was the beginning of May on our family vacation.  While it was more of a hobble, he moved independently on his feet.  Early last week was the last time he used his crutches.  He has been crawling and moving about on office chairs that we propel him with.  Although getting in and out is not without its hazards, Jordan's freedom in the water makes it worth it.

And here is where our help comes from:
"1 I lift up my eyes to the hills (when he is in the hot tub, the view of the hills are just behind his head) -- where does my help come from? 2 My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth. 3 He will not let your foot slip-- he who watches over you will not slumber; 4 indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. 5 The LORD watches over you-- the LORD is your shade at your right hand; 6 the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night. 7 The LORD will keep you from all harm-- he will watch over your life; 8 the LORD will watch over your coming and going both now and forever more. (Psalms 121:3-8 NIV)

Last week, after a flash rain, we discovered water seeping through the baseboards of our downstairs guest bathroom.  Apparently a drainage pipe was blocked and the rain flooded underneath the foundation beneath our front door.  Somehow - like the stolen truck - it just didn't faze us in light of Jordan's suffering.  Steve, the disaster clean up expert, met with Kim this morning to tell him that insurance will cover it and our deductible has been covered as well.  Will I ever not cry in the face of kindness?  Every time, when we stumble, Father puts someone in our path to lift us up - an email, a phone call, a prayer, a card. We experience favour on every side.  It is Jordan's turn to experience favour in his body... today.

Planning

So Jordan went to sleep tonight planning out what he'll do when he sees his body restored.  Heads up - it includes a lot of parties with lots of food.  He wants to invite everyone who has been praying for him to a giant banquet where we end up commanding every sickness, disease and pain to GO!

But the first day Jordan wants to show up at his friends' schools and during lunch and just say "Hi, let's throw a football around!" Before that, he will run out on the street just yelling that he is healed.  He'll play frisbee and badminton with me, basketball with his dad and take Tucker for runs, not walks.

This morning in our Sunday gathering, Jordan blessed me for living up to the name I married into.   Somewhere back we read the name Unrau means tenacious and have reminded our sons of that ever since.  It is who we are and who we are becoming.

The friends praying over the phone for Jordan this week has been life to us since we haven't been really social.  Joel flew home yesterday for a week long stay.....sooo good to have him with us.  He just jumps into bed beside Jordan or lays on the floor near him and just lays his hands on him to command in the Name of Jesus.

Shield of Faith

It really works!  Middle of the night when the black thoughts just assailed my senses I finally just held up my hands with my shield of faith.  I could almost hear the arrows sizzle out and extinguish as they hit.  I'm so grateful for those of you who are holding up our arms in prayer.

Radiation was completed today.  We celebrated with a Booster Juice but Jordan's swollen tongue made it too difficult to use the straw. We returned home for Kim and Jordan to play a video game but Jordan's blurry vision cut that short.  It's time for the truth of Jesus' victory 2000 years ago to set Jordan's body free today.

Streaming Tears

Tears were streaming down Jordan's face as he awoke this morning in agonizing pain and sorrow that his hope of complete restoration was not yet met.  And hope was high.  Yesterday, over 50 warriors revolved through our family room, mostly from New Life Church. It was a marathon of worship and prayer, initiated by our friends Harley and Sheila, for 8 solid hours. What an outrageous gift!  Initially, Kim and I were unsure as to how Jordan would be able to handle it all.  But as Kim tucked him in, he sighed a happy sigh and said that he could do that again.

Tears were streaming down Jordan's face later in the morning as stunning fiery pain hit his good leg in the doctor's office. We didn't even want to be at the cancer clinic unless it was to show the doctor and technicians the miracle of Jordan's amazing body.  When the doctor re-entered, he commented that the meds seemed to have taken effect quickly.  Jordan's immediate response was that the pain had disappeared before the meds were given because Kim and I had prayed. 

Tears were streaming down my face this afternoon after Jordan called me to the couch upon hearing me raise my voice at the brooms for not fitting in their closet.  He wanted to pray for my peace.  We had just returned from the first of five radiation treatments to his spine for the crippling back pain.  It was tough.  He had to remain alone and unmoving in a difficult position for several minutes while the technicians and I left the room.  He was pale and drawn when we returned, stuffing down the pain and the drive home was jarring to his body. And I guess my tension came out at the obstinate broom handles.  Jordan requested I sit at the end of the couch, let him hold my hand and speak the peace of God over my heart and mind.  He prayed that I would enjoy Jesus in that moment.  And that was significant to me.  Thinking on the difficult past only makes me sad or angry over what Jordan has had to endure.  Thinking on any scary future only causes fear and dread.  We have the present - I've heard that is why it is called a gift.

Tears are streaming down my face as I sit down to write to you.  I've just come from kissing Jordan goodnight.  He had fallen asleep on the couch and when roused to go to bed, pain hit once again.  Our friend Linda, living in Texas, had just called and she prayed for Jordan on speaker phone as he made his way "bum walking" up the stairs.  We must have made quite a sight through our living room window as I held Jordan's leg for him while he crawled up the stairs backwards and Kim held the phone so we could hear her declaring the power of God.  She has seen so many physical miracles and knows her authority in Christ.  As the pain left Jordan, he asked me, "Why would the enemy hit me with that pain in my left leg today in the doctor's office?  Wouldn't he know that we would just call on Jesus?  That's what we always do.  He can never stop us from turning to Jesus and he can never take that away."  It is apparent that Jordan believes Jesus' words when He said that the enemy comes to steal, kill and destroy but Jesus came that we might have life...and life abundant.

Jordan reminds us that he loves and treasures us throughout the day.  He often offers long hugs and expresses gratitude for the little things.  We have talked quite a bit recently about the difference for us between sorrow and discouragement.  Sorrow is being real and honest with yourself, others and God. Discouragement is an enemy that saps our courage and joy. I realize when I write this he comes out looking like a saint.  Today I can't help it - that's how I experienced our son.

Messing with the Wrong Family!

Last night I wrote the following to my dear friend Sue. But after sending it, I realized that I wanted to share it on the blog.  I'm pretty sure she won't mind since she has been on board with Plan A all the way.

“You can't know how much your constancy blesses us.  We know that when you have something in your teeth, you will not let go.  That is how I am with this battle.  The cancerous tumours and all the damage has to go because of Jesus.  He said it and I believe it and Jordan receives it.  The whole thing is becoming clearer and more simple every day....while the circumstances become increasingly complex and confusing.  It all comes down to where I focus.
The enemy picked the wrong family to mess with.”

Jordan's Requests

We are rehearsing truth constantly.  The alternative is to live in loss and mourning and that is just not an option for any of us.  In addition to Jordan's leg (where the tumour appears to have moved upwards) and spine, where pain has attacked at random, his right eyesight and right side of his tongue, affecting speech and chewing, have been our battle zones.  In the morning, his ability to swallow and digest has sometimes been compromised.  Jordan asked us to make you all aware of these specific sites of conflict in his body, many of which have arisen in the last few days.  As we speak the victory of Jesus and command Jordan's body to obey, he is able to experience relief and the peace of Christ in a short period of time.  These skirmishes stem from their source - cancerous tumours....so they have to go.

My girlfriend in Calgary asked me on Monday what our plans for the week are.  It’s a good question that took me by surprise.  We plan to make the most of every day - to love each other well - to walk closely and partner with our Heavenly Father in seeing victory for Jordan in every arena. When Jordan feels up to it, we get in the vehicle and go - to the park, mall, restaurant, friend's house, or just for a ride.  Dates and times are blurring.  The colours are turning so it's autumn.  Time for leaves to shrivel, die and fall off the tree - like cancer in my son's body.  Everything points back to that.  Our lives are so focused it's incredible.

We did not ask for this fight but we are in it.  And we declare "The Battle is the Lord's!"

In Due Time

In many ways, caring for Jordan has brought out the best in me...because he requires it.  And from my viewpoint, this challenge is bringing out the best in everyone who meets Jordan or becomes aware of our journey.  My Dad used to say that when the toothpaste tube gets squeezed, you find out what's really inside.  His way of describing what tough times revealed..

Before this year began, whenever I had imagined the "worst case scenario", I found myself fearing the possibility of losing my faith in God.  It never even crossed my mind that, as a family, our faith would have grown.  But it has not only grown, it has changed.  I don't believe in just holding on until heaven.  More than ever, I know that following Jesus means walking as He walked...seeing people.  Really seeing their needs and reaching out to meet them through the power of God.  In all these months we have yet to encounter a stranger who has refused prayer or not been appreciative afterwards.  What was I so afraid of? I think I was mostly afraid that nothing would happen and I would embarrass God.  Yet while I haven't always been present when the prayer is answered,  something always happened and I've only experienced the pleasure of God.

To catch you all up, our time in Calgary with Joel was wonderful.  Our catered meal turned out to be an adventure.  It arrived an hour late after polite, inquiring calls we're made.  Initially, a "thrown together" meal was delivered as it appeared our friends' initial order had been lost.  Just as we began parcelling it out, the real thing arrived in giant trays...easily enough to feed 20 hungry men. Of course we were overwhelmed.  My first thought was that this is how Jordan's healing will come.  It has been delayed and we were so anticipating it, hungry and bewildered and those that ordered it were not a little irritated.  But when the answer comes, boy will it come and many, many will benefit.

This was the verse that kept coming to mind this weekend...
Gal.6:9 "Let us not become weary in the prolonged effort of doing good, for in due season we will reap the harvest if we do not become enfeebled through exhaustion and faint."

Up On One Leg

Canmore, AB

I remember thinking just a few weeks ago that I was so looking forward to no longer hearing the sound of crutches.  But on Tuesday when I heard them once again, it was a comforting sign of recovery. Independence for a teenager is incredibly important.

We were able to move Jordan's last radiation treatment to yesterday morning so we were off to Alberta much earlier than we originally planned. The trip was a stunning display of the creativity, beauty and power of God.  How could anyone think this all just "happened"?

Jordan commented that this would be a very convenient time to be completely restored.  We agree.  Enough already. Thing is, I have never before taken seriously the aspect of displaying His kingdom through praying for healing wherever I go...not just when someone I love is affected.   Was reading in Isaiah 53 and in original Hebrew it says "Jesus has borne our sickness and carried our pain". It is finished.  By His stripes we were healed...past tense.  Done deal. Just like we don't need to pay for our sins, because Jesus did.

Friends loaned us their SUV so that Jordan could stretch out on a mattress in the back.  Of course Tucker was stretched out as well.  :-) So often throughout the trip our son declared that he was almost too comfortable. Music to our ears.

Friends in Calgary have offered us their home to stay in for this Thanksgiving weekend while they vacate.  So kind.  And now we've received an email that they are sending us a complete catered Thanksgiving dinner Sunday evening.  Beyond what we imagined....

Joel is with us this morning and we're toodling through Canmore, AB on the edge of the Rockies. So fun to be with him.

Expecting

You know what I love?  Observing my son expecting the best...expecting to see the power of God breakthrough in his body...expecting things to get better and not worse.   That is faith.  He has always been a very "present" person. Most children are.  But after everything Jordan has been through it would be understandable to dread.  Capturing his thoughts and replacing them with truth has become a discipline.  For him and for us. Truth - Every good gift is from God.  He doesn't give us bad stuff.  Truth - The all-powerful Creator of the Universe is in me.  He wants me to use the authority He has given me to make wrong things right.

We're outside in the front yard watching the clouds race by.  Looks like the warmer days are behind us but I hope to still enjoy sitting outside.  It probably comes from having a front porch growing up.  Very very few of the homes in our neighbourhood have anything resembling a front porch.  Most have garages that we disappear into.

Two treatments down and three to go and then we're thinking of hitching up the RV (or not, depending if there is snow in the mountains this weekend and the truck has been fixed) and driving to Calgary for Canadian Thanksgiving.  Usually we are here for an extended family apple juicing time but Joel is missing us and we're missing him. Calgary is the halfway point between his school and Kelowna.  Matt can't get away....yet.  We are still hoping.