When I woke Jordan this
morning for his medication, I found movement at the foot of his bed.
Tucker sneaked a peak out from under the blankets with a questioning
look. Ever since we started our road trip, Tucker has made Jordan's bed
his regular post.
Measured Jordan's leg once
again and it is down another .3 of a centimeter. Choosing to yell and
shout ...to thank Father for every movement towards health. I still vote
for faster versus slower. My tolerance for sickness is lessening.
Was reading a bit of John G. Lake's life and when he watched half of his
siblings die and personally struggled with rheumatism and blindness, there was
not a lot good he had to say about disease. The first principle for those
he trained to heal the sick was to be fed up with sickness.
Through the years of
watching my father suffer, first with his incredible back pain, then weakened
lungs from multiple pneumonia and in the last 15 years with cancer and heart
disease I saw his patience and resolve to enjoy life and somehow came to accept
illness as a difficult by permanent member of our family. It is so
different with my strong and healthy teenager. Maybe because I did see
him strong and healthy for 14 years. Maybe because I am his mother and that is
that mother bear in me. Maybe because I witnessed up close too many
miraculous and often instantaneous hearings over the last 2 decades that I know
there is an option. With my dad as part of the great cloud of witnesses
now, I cannot imagine he would want us to quit pursuing complete restoration
for his youngest grandchild. Yet these last few days have been
excruciating for me...I think for Jordan as well.
The battle in my mind is
so loud, I am surprised those near me can't hear it. It was wild to sit
in the gatherings at Bethel and witness people from around the globe receiving
instant hearings for their body....so fun! Knees with metal in them that
previously couldn't bend were now jumping, cysts were disappearing before our
eyes....with everything in me I wanted to see the entire mass on Jordan's leg
shrivel before his eyes. Instead he received more prayer and we
returned to Canada choosing to believe before we see.
Jordan had another dream
where he was fighting 4 witches. They were hideous and strong. The battle
was extended with no evidence of movement on either side. All of a
sudden, he remembered that he was not alone and that God was in him. As
he reached out to touch each one, his finger or weapon would pierce their
defenses and shatter them.
Sometimes from the back of
the truck on the way home Jordan would request prayer for his hope. He
and Kim had long talks about battles in the mind. At those times, I would
take the back seat and nap. We did take mini-detours on the way home into redwood
country and the California coastline. Normally the ocean brings me such
life - displaying the never-ending majesty and power of God. But with
Jordan initially staying put in the back of the truck rather than struggle over
the driftwood and rocks with his crutches, Tucker was the one who went wild on
the sand with the waves and made me laugh. Laughter in the middle of
pain...
By the time we reached
Deception Pass in Washington, Jordan was up for a marshmallow roast on the
beach. Much more enjoyable and I don't mind my burnt ones at all - maybe
I even meant to let them catch on fire.
And at the tail end of the
trip, what a treat to make a quick dash into the Abbotsford hospital on the way
home to hold my friend's newborn baby girl! I had not entered a hospital
with such joy in...forever.
Someday I look forward to
meeting each and every person who has been holding up our arms during this
time. I know for sure that I didn't get many thank you emails or notes
out, especially in the first few months.
